
LITTLE MARCO, BIG JOBS
What’s that in the springtime air over Washington, D.C.? The faint whiff of accountability.
- It’s hard to fail out of MAGAworld. Just ask President Donald Trump. The guy ended his first term with a national crisis so severe that average folks couldn’t find toilet paper. Then, he caught dozens of felony convictions, and somehow found himself right back into the White House. Still, mistakes and incompetence are piling up three months in — and, suddenly, it looks like political gravity is starting to weigh on some of Trump’s buddies.
- Just ask national security adviser Mike Waltz, whose job had been on the rocks ever since he mistakenly added a journalist to the now-infamous group chat about classified warplans. Has that stopped him from using Signal? Nope. He was busted using it in a cabinet meeting yesterday when a photographer snapped an image of his screen, lol. Leaking a private chat with Vice President JD Vance on his way out the door! Amazing.
- This afternoon, Trump confirmed that Waltz is done. He lasted “9.2 Scaramuccis,” wrote former White House comms director Anthony Scaramucci, who was ousted after 11 days on the job.
- The temporary replacement? Marco Rubio… who will continue to serve as secretary of state… and national archivist. No one saw that coming, including people inside Trumpworld: “That’s so wild,” one current official texted me. Another’s reaction: “Wow.” State Department spokesperson Tammy Bruce was asked about the news: “I just heard this from you,” she told a reporter. Trump nominated Waltz to be the next U.S. ambassador to the United Nations. Good communication, guys!
- Rubio’s selection is just another example of Trump’s unpredictable nature. Rubio wasn’t even on the list of rumored candidates earlier today — and only Nixon-era Henry Kissinger has ever served as natsec adviser and secretary of state. But Trump, as always, is intent on using other people’s last shreds of credibility as cover for his own ends. Rubio is one of the few normie politicians left in his orbit. On the other hand, Steve Witkoff, a roving diplomat and longtime Trump golf buddy who was seen as top contender for the job, is viewed by even some in Trump’s crew as “a bumbling fucking idiot.”
Speaking of bumbling idiots, Elon Musk is having a bad time, too.
- The so-called “Department of Government Efficiency” hasn’t been super efficient in rooting out waste in the federal government, Musk recently admitted to a group of journalists. “I think we’ve been effective. Not as effective as I like… but we’ve made progress,” he said, before comparing DOGE to Buddhism.
- Musk’s tenure at DOGE is expected to end soon. But suddenly, there are questions about his role at Tesla, too. Musk’s electric car company was forced to deny a report that its board members have started formally searching for a new CEO. The company’s sales and stock price have plummeted, largely thanks to Musk’s unpopular politics. The backlash is clearly messing with the gazillionaire’s head: “Being attacked relentlessly is not super fun,” he told the journalists. “Seeing cars on fire is not fun.”
- Musk’s slash-and-burn approach has made him intensely unpopular among the federal workforce. “Musk is a whiny billionaire with low self-esteem,” one federal contractor texted me. “He knows he’s running Tesla into the ground. The Tesla board members (and majority investors) are not going to tolerate him emptying their wallets.”
What’s more, over 1,000 May Day demonstrations took place today across the country to protest Trump and Musk’s handling of the government, which organizers call “a war on working people.” When it rains, it pours.
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NEWS NEWS NEWS
Donald Trump is skeptical of Republican lawmakers’ plans to cut hundreds of billions in Medicaid funding to pay for his tax cuts, Politico reports. Trump’s new stance is ironic, considering Trump endorsed the “big beautiful bill” that includes $880 billion in cuts to the program, which provides health insurance coverage to some 80 million low-income Americans.
Some Trump administration officials are hoarding toilet paper and other goods in anticipation of tariffs jacking up prices. Asked why they’re prepping like it’s Armageddon, a Trump aide explained: “Because it would be stupid not to!”
Gov. Gretchen Whitmer (D-MI) defended her recent work with the Trump administration. “It doesn’t mean I’ve abandoned any of my values. It doesn’t mean that I’m not gonna stand my ground,” Whitmer told Pod Save America. “This is one of those moments where as a public servant, you’re reminded your job is to put service above self, and that’s what it was all about.”
The White House is latching onto newly revealed domestic abuse allegations against Kilmar Abrego Garcia, the Maryland father who was mistakenly deported to El Salvador, to argue that he shouldn’t be returned. Let’s not forget, however, that this is about whether we even have rules in this country: Abrego Garcia was flown out of the country without due process, which is against the law.
You know the economy is bad when people are even skimping on McDonald’s value meals. The fast food giant’s sales plunged 3.6 percent in the United States in the first quarter of the year, a stark contrast to a 2.5 percent rise in sales during the same period last year. I’m not lovin’ this.
Famed anti-vaxxer and HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. is planning to order placebo testing for new vaccines, in which some people get a saline stab and others get the real deal. That’s common for vaccines targeting new pathogens, but experts say it makes no sense for well-researched diseases such as polio and measles. By the way, measles cases have now popped up in Canada and Mexico, too. Thanks, RFK!
On that note, the Trump administration is planning to pump $500 million into a project to create a “universal” vaccine that could fight multiple virus strains at once. Many other scientists, including Anthony Fauci, have aimed to create a universal vaccine, but none succeeded. Yes, let’s leave it to the guy whose brain was eaten by a worm.
Christian leaders and scholars rebuked the Trump administration’s effort to root out “anti-Christian bias” in the federal workforce. In a letter, the group rejected the claim that there’s rampant widespread Christian persecution in the United States (duh), hinting at another motive for the taskforce: “We are also aware of how claims of ‘anti-Christian bias’ are shown to provide cover for white supremacy,” they wrote. If it walks like a duck…
House Republicans accidentally slashed $1 billion from Washington, D.C.’s budget, causing local officials and workers to worry about sweeping cuts to the workforce and city services. Now, those same lawmakers say they’ve been too busy to fix the problem: “Boy, that’s gone quiet, hasn’t it? I haven’t heard anything about that in a while. I have no idea what the current status is,” Rep. Keith Self (R-TX) told NOTUS. Great! Can D.C. have full representation in Congress, please?
Trump has gotten so frustrated with delays on his new Air Force One plane that he commissioned a defense contractor to refurbish a Boeing 747 — that was previously used by the Qatari government
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